Inner  Frontier
Fourth Way Spiritual Practice

 

Inner Work


For the week of March 26, 2007


Demands of self

Our self-centeredness, the egoism that we believe we are, expects and demands that the world adapt itself to us and our desires. A traffic jam is a personal insult. A physical illness or injury is an undeserved affront. A lack of appreciation or an insufficient salary causes an inner revolt against our employer. The least social slight rattles our self-assumed status and our superficial demanded-dignity. The world revolves around “me” and when it fails to conform to “my” desires, it throws “my” inner life into disarray.

In psychological terms, self-centeredness may paradoxically be the root of our unhappiness, because that self can never be completely satisfied. But even more seriously in spiritual terms, the whole complex of egoistic attitudes totally blocks the Sacred from reaching us. The false structure of egoism takes the Divine gift of free will, ties a knot in it, and declares the knot to be “me.” That knot disrupts all possible communication and connection with the Higher, leaving us stranded in a self-created, spiritual desert.

The practice of humility is the antidote that loosens the knot of self-will and leads both to lasting happiness and to the Sacred. Where humility finds peace and contentment, self demands more. Humility begins with seeing those varied demands of self, understanding their source as egoism, and letting them go. Through prayer, humility serves and reconnects with the Sacred. The act of acknowledging a higher, more intelligent, more compassionate force inherently humbles us. Despite the disappointments and pain that come our way, humility is grateful for the gift of this miraculous life.

Of course, not all emotional upsets arise from self-centeredness. But many do. To understand ourselves means to know the difference.

For this week, notice the demands of self for what they are. Whenever you find yourself upset, notice whether the core issue concerns some demand of self. This does not require and extensive self-interrogation to investigate the source of your motives. Rather, it means an instantaneous, intuitive, conscience-based seeing of whether ego is in play in that moment. The seeing can sometimes even liberate the emotional reaction almost instantly. So form the intention to see the demands of your small self and, when the opportunities arise, be there in simple honesty to notice.


     

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