Commitment to and Confidence in the Spiritual Path
Commitment means that we know, in our heart of hearts, that we
shall persevere in a course of action, come what may. Good parents are
defined by their utter commitment to the welfare of their children, regardless
of whatever challenges may arise. On the ground, when we meet the unforeseen
events brought by time, creativity and compromise may be necessary; we
may need to bend without breaking our commitment.
What causes us to commit ourselves to a course of action? In the case of
parenting, it is love and conscience, knowing intuitively what’s right, what
matters. In the case of the spiritual path, it is the same. Love and intuiting
the truth about our world bring us toward a stronger, more all-encompassing
commitment to the spiritual journey. The circumstances precipitating commitment
vary as widely as do people. The “how I got started on the path” stories always
fascinate, with their coincidences and unexpected episodes.
The spiritual quest begins with
the excitement of a new discovery, a new love, a new world. We eagerly learn the
methods and practice them with zest. Our teachers inspire confidence in the
possibility of transformation and arouse our hope that our own sincere efforts
will carry us far along the path. Early results of our practice surprise and
delight us, confirming the rightness of the approach and establishing our
confidence in the path.
Then a dry spell enters. With no
noticeable progress or evident movement, we seem to be treading water.
Seeing how we are inwardly, always identifying with thoughts, emotions,
and body, gradually builds a weariness of this ordinary way of living.
We cannot stop our quest, but we also cannot see our way forward. The
weariness, however, leaves us nowhere else to turn. Faith and commitment
enable us to persevere through such spiritual deserts. Then somehow we
bridge the abyss. For example, we realize that we practice because we
must. And furthermore, that the source of this “must” lies beyond our
consciousness, in the unseen realm that gives faith. This realization
leads to confidence that we shall not stop, shall never give up. Our inner
work reaches a new tempo and depth, allowing confidence in our own eventual
transformation to take root, further bolstering our practice. We reach
unexpected experiences of higher states and intimations of possibilities
of deeper forms of service. This reinvigorates our commitment to the path
toward greater being.
A new difficulty arises, however,
where despite our continuing best efforts, we reach another plateau of
no further progress. Our confidence in our practice and in our own future
transformation evaporates for a time. At a loss, we turn toward the higher
and ask for help. Then our confidence shifts from ourselves to the Divine.
We discover the faith that eventually the door to love and the higher
worlds will open even to us.
And so we continue. Sometimes our movement is passionate, even
desperate. Commitment and desperation form two wings of the same force,
the flame of longing for the Real. Desperation combines this intense longing
with the dissatisfaction of separation and the fear of failure in the
quest. Desperation burns urgently and transports us to new peaks, but
soon flickers. Commitment, however, remains to warm and sustain us through
the inevitable droughts. The basic longing behind both commitment and
desperation moves us, offers us tastes of new worlds, and brings confidence
in ourselves, in the path, and in the Sacred.
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